so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
3pm strippers are depressing
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize