But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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