so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
