If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
