Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
