69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
