My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Randomize
