69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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