Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
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