WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
