Sponge bath it is.
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Randomize