he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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