she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
