I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
