We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
