Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize
