Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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