If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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