wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
He keeps bees of course he's weird
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
