How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Vodka?
Forever.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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