They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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