Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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