i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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