we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Randomize
