i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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