she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I need to sanitize my soul.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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