Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
