We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
