I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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