Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
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