fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
