Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
