Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
The adults are the big ones right?
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
