that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize
