Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
