if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
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