Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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