Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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