I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
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