You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
