Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
