omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize