You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
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