You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
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