Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Randomize
