Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
