At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
