Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
