singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
where does the pee come out of this thing
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
