I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
