Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
