Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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